The Rough Years 2

The murder of my parent not only put me into a spiral of depression, the investigation was unsuccessful in ever solving the crime
When I was released from the hospital I felt really guilt ridden for not being able to attend the funeral and on top of that I had to find strength to return to work since my responsibilities had not stopped. ( alimony, child support and taking care of my aunt and family).
The police sent detectives to interview my aunt and later me about the murder. I was even asked to take a lie detector test which they said was routine to clear me of any suspicion. And for weeks a team of detectives poured over details with my aunt and I trying to find a motive or what had occurred………to no avail.
Because I had no clue as to why they were murdered, I felt fearful for my family and myself since I may have been the target because of my involvement in the abortion clinic and they were the victim of some crazys by mistake. This fear had me looking over my shoulder and losing sleep for several years. It definitely had an affect on my health in general and though I had stopped smoking the alcohol use continued. ( I was not into any sedatives or antidepressants).
I set about the project of completing the house they had started with all the headaches and financial burden that it entailed. Once that got started it at least gave my Aunt Mad and Rena something to distract them by the job of getting that job done.
One of the problems of a new building project was what I had experienced with my previous ones…….a poor general contractor. I ended up firing him and getting someone to finish the job but at an increased cost. ( my continuing luck).
Once the house was completed we moved Aunt Mad in with us because it had been my parents plan for her to live with them. This proved to be a disruptive situation in that I had a 1yr old, a 14 yr old and a 70 yr old and a recent marriage. I wouldn’t wish this on anyone especially recovering from the trauma that we had all experienced. So it was probably to be expected I had another arrhythmia attack 6 months later. Now my physician had me on a potpourri of medicines that made me constantly fatigued. I was mentally and physically exhausted and on a spinning wheel that wouldn’t stop.
Then I received a call that my favorite cousin Bill had been murdered in Chicago……..would all this never end!


We had hired a nanny to care for Becky and a very good friend invited us to visit him in my favorite city San Francisco. This was a needed relief and I was able to relax and recharge my body and spirit. We shopped, ate crab by the bay and generally had a good time. When I returned home unfortunately
It was back to the usual.
I was trying to find some sort of outlet to release my tension, I had always loved to read but it was not getting it done. So I took up golf and really loved the game but I never could concentrate because Rena was always interrupting me on the course with some trivial problem, So I ended up just hanging out in my spare time a bar run by a friend called Red’s. And because bars are for drinking, I drank and drank. Luckily I was able to function and avoid anything like a DUI, but I knew it was not the healthiest behavior in the world. But it was an escape to go into a dark cool bar and BS with friends about nothing, sipping on a favorite libation mixed by a favorite barmaid. This was my hangout and my friend Jimmy, the owner, was himself murdered by an irate customer one night over nothing some years later. Bad things seemed to be circling me like a vulture circles a carcass.
What more could happen? Plenty, just read on.